How do you protect speed cameras from getting vandalized? Easy, you put security cameras on them to watch for the vandals. Hmm… so what do you do when the vandals start knocking those cameras over before they vandalize the speed cameras? I guess you’ll need a security camera to monitor the security camera too. Ahhh, what happens when they start hitting the security camera that’s monitoring the security camera???
In what is probably an attempt by the Republican party at boosting the images of George Bush and Arnold Schwarzenegger, a new candidate for the Wisconsin secretary of state lets you see how much worse it could be. I mean, would you rather have a 65 year old groupie that writes things like, “Here he was, in the flesh! Oh! My God! He was soooo CUTE!” over our current leaders? Granted, she was a bit younger when she wrote that… a young and spry 63. Of course all those red states could always switch to blue, but we all know that’s not happening anytime soon.
The British Fertility Society is recommending that very obese women (with a BMI > 36) should be denied fertility treatment. For those that don’t know, to get a BMI (Body Mass Index) of 36, a girl that’s 5′4″ would have to tip the scales at 210. Girls that have a BMI over 29 would be forced to “address their weight” before they could get treatment. In the Ali G movie, he makes a law to only allow the hot girls into the country, but this would be nipping the problem at the source. Now if only they could devise some scientific ugly index so that the ugly skinny girls could be weeded out too.
Pacifist monks hold peace protest. Other monks ruin protest. Pacifist monks throw down on other monks. Pacifism rules!
I’m all about setting goals, but this is ridiculous. How do quotas for adding people to the watch list help? The worst thing is that every false addition to the list deteriorates the ability to find real terrorists with it. It’s kind of like listening to a fanboy talk about the latest (Apple|AMD|Trojans|X-Men) stuff. You know there might be one or two good points in there, but you just can’t sift through all the biased garbage to recognize them.
Why bother getting poorly translated tattoos in languages you don’t know? Rather than having the Chinese symbol for “gas” on your arm that only a few people can laugh at, you might as well be clear like Marcus Camby with his tattoo that says “Mr. Camby” in English so that everyone can laugh at the stupid tattoo joke. Or maybe he was just tired of the lack of respect that he was getting, in which case his next tattoo will probably be something like, “Yes, sir.”
I shouldn’t really make fun of this since my mom likes Barry Manilow, but then again, that’s probably the reason it works.
I feel bad whenever I think about how much time I used to waste playing video games during college. None of that compares to the levels of productivity coming from this guy though. I wonder if he was happy just typing, or if he’s only happy now that he’s getting some recognition for it.
Poor guy. They win a championship and charter a boat for a victory celebration, but he drinks too much on the bus ride there and can’t even get on the boat. Let that be a lesson for everyone, don’t party until the time is right.
For anyone that doesn’t believe college is worthwhile, you should read this fine example of the writing quality achieved by attending a school of higher learning. Well, at least if you attend a school of USC’s caliber.
I’m sure everyone’s seen the ninja style tshirt folding video by now, but I just liked seeing all the japanese household tricks videos in one place. I have yet to try peeling a potato by dropping it in ice water though.
With all the fear of terrorist attacks, the Department of Homeland Security is getting a lot of money to ease these fears. I don’t really think putting a bunch of cameras in the middle of nowhere is a great way to stop the terrorists though. Makes me happy to know that my tax dollars are being well spent.
I don’t know if this woman is just confused or what. Maybe they won’t notice that the woman giving the urine sample is standing at the urinal? Definitely makes me wary of using public microwaves now though.
This guy with erectile difficulties tried to take matters into his own hands by shoving a pencil up his tunta. I used to work in the ER where sometimes we had to drain bladders by sticking a catheter up there, and I can tell you without a doubt that not a single one of them liked it. What really amazes me is that this guy was able to make it halfway through sex before the paramedics had to come, or that he was even able to walk from the bathroom to the bedroom with a pencil there in the first place.
For all those who remember the movie Top Gun, we’re getting old. At one time the hottest plane around, the F-14 Tomcat has officially flown its last mission. With Maverick going crazy nowadays and the plane too old to maintain in the navy, it seems that the movie has lost all hope of having any modern appeal. At least He-Man is coming back, but hopefully it won’t be so horrible it makes kids only have memories of it being really bad.